instruct

instruct destruct deconstruct reconstruct firetruck flyingfuck and beat me with a dead duck until I run out of luck

wax

early in the morning my consciousness waxes like the crescent moon evolving into a fully lit ball of white mooniness. and like the moon, the light of my mind, as it awakes, cast increasingly brilliant moonshadows against the back of my skull.

... concept

trying to conceptualize everything that your heart is trying to accomplish inside your brain is no easy task. a shame that with all the intelligence our minds may have, we can't seem to understand the raw power of that incessant "thump thump."

______

this one surprised me. i never really know what i'm going to get before i press post... so reading it "published" over there at oneword can really knock me on my ass sometimes. the fact that these thoughts exist inside of me without my prior knowledge is inspiring- yet frustrating all at the same time. it makes me wonder if i took more time to randomly write and associate things...

well. maybe my brain would come to understand more of what's beating deep in the core of me. the subconscious is a brilliant and overwhelming idea. especially when taken in the context of jung's "collective." this is one of those times where i think i might have made a bit of a connection.

tapping in. yet feeling tapped out.

... deal

"we don't make deals like that around here. i'm sorry lady... but this is a serious business."

"oh please. every table has something going on underneath it."

"yeah... and in my bar... the only thing is a game of footsie."

deal

deal with the repercussive consequences... good or bad... reaping only the good ones and leaving the bad is missing half of life.

we interrupt this almost dead weblog with a few special announcements:

i liked where this site was going. i liked how different we all were and how we showed that the simplest thing (like one word) can be felt in so many ways.

but we aren't doing that anymore. hell... i doubt half of us are even reading this thing. so i cleaned house. if you hadn't posted in 2 months... i removed you from the blog. please, as my previous post discussed: don't take it personally.

if you have any desire to become an active member again, please just let me know and it's all gravy. i'm sure a few of you won't even notice that you've been pulled.

it's time to evolve... and i look forward to see what, if anything, this turns into.

if you aren't a current (or former) author and you are interested in joining, drop a note. and even if you are just reading... a note would make my day too. i don't have a counter or stats system for this page, so the possibility of these words being read by others is quite the mystery to me.

... personal

maybe i've just been taking things too personally. we all want to think that everything in this existence really IS all about us... but maybe it isn't. realizing you aren't as important as you'd like to be is just another reason to feel offended. vicious. vicious cycle.

interrupt

the hunger is ever-present uninterruptible. feed me what i need. nutritious. delicious. non of that quickie, processed crap. i want substance.

erased

take the back end of your mental pencil and erase the psychic demons sketched in shaded graphite tones... for that is all they are

stand

I sit all day at this vapid terminal, staring into a void of electrons and binary bits that have been gelled into something discernable.

incredible

the vastness of my ego can be quite incredible. sometimes i pause and think, "hey, I better humble it up a bit so that I'm more approachable to Joe Average."