wild

wildly whipping and whirling and wheeling. frantically tapping and touching and feeling.

hidden

in front of the sky, in front of the clouds / in front of the light, in front of the shrouds/ i see the mystic clarity / the reflection of the hidden sea

... bubblegum

chew. chew. chew. smooth out over tongue. press through teeth. purse lips. blow. go crossed-eyed.

pop.

flush of heat to the cheeks. quick swipe of the hands. i'm sure no one noticed.

... zeal

what an ugly word. almost as ugly as your face. i can't think of anything positive to say about it. i'm sure it can serve its purpose, but i'm going to avoid using it out of aesthetic principle.

... vary

ok. this time we'll change it up. maybe we will get a different outcome.

socially experiment with the lives and relationships you develop without consciously knowing the damage that is done just to test a hypothesis you don't want to know the answer to anyway.

... sight

big eyes. he had such big eyes. you'd think that he'd see more than the rest of us. that somewhere, in those glassy pools of blue... there'd be more.

but there wasn't really anything. just a bigger bit of empty.

... check

a series. with balance. keep yourself together. do your job and remember to always buckle your seatbelt. squat over public toilets. show just enough cleavage without looking like a slut. play it smart. never let them in.

i call bullshit.

... pattern

find a boy. make sure he's a challenge. be your charming self. get inside. fuck him up. fall in love. cry. make him cry. say you're sorry. rinse. repeat.

metaphor

metaphor isn't like a meta-tag. a metaphor is gamera spreading his mothy wings and taking literary flight

shy

shy? fly around the corner and hide. inside where you can't be found. sounds give you away. stay quite and don't breath

... dearest

mommy can i please stay close to you through all of this? i remember when i used to crawl up inside your arms and feel so safe. nothing feels like that anymore. nothing at all.